Inspiration

My dad e-mailed me a version of this story. The subject line: "When God says, 'when' ". I couldn't get the version he sent to post, so here's another one from you-tube...it gives me goosebumps:




I am inspired and full of hope when I see the triumph of Jason McElwain. It encourages me to press forward and continue to encourage and involve Jackson in activities his peers participate in. Sometimes, I need to remind myself of the importance of a nudge in the right direction--Jackson loves being part of a 'team': t-ball, soccer, and now boyscouts. Who knows, maybe he will take up basketball...

"The sky is the limit...never give up" Jason McElwain

Talent Fair

UGH!

Jackson's elementary school has a "talent fair" every February. Kids in kindergarten to 2nd grade are invited to participate by writing a book or doing a science project. Kids in grades 3-5 are required to participate. It's actually a great concept: allow kids a variety of subjects to explore (in addition to science projects, and writing, there is dance, voice, instrumental, photography and probably another subject I'm forgetting). I like that Jackson is held to the same 'standard' as other kids in that he's required to participate. It kind of forces parents to get more 'hands-on' with kid projects & I sometimes wonder if it's not a contest for the parents, but...I like that he has the chance to show others there are some things he can do just like his peers.

In the past Jack has always submitted a book. In kindergarten he actually won his grade level with Jackson at the Zoo. Basically we took photos from trips to various zoos and wrote captions for them. I always strive to have the books/projects be his idea and as much "his work" as possible. His 2nd grade book was awesome: Who took the Cookies from the Cookie Jar adapted using his stuffed animals. It was his original idea he just made it up one night in bed just after reading the original story...he took photos of his stuffed animals next to the cookie jar. It was a great story and I doubt the judges really understood just how incredible the story was. At any rate, in 3rd grade he "wrote" a fabulous Franklin [the turtle] inspired book Franklin goes to Texas with Jackson. Again, Jack took photos during our trip to visit his cousins in Texas. It was really adorable and I was disappointed he wasn't rewarded anymore for all the work he did on it! [Read between the lines here; all the work we did on it! I really do think it would be easier just to do it for him, but....]

So this year we decided to do photography. Jackson has done photography for 4-H and he loves to take pictures...But, I'm starting to wonder, "Why did I sign Jackson up for photography?"

He wasn't able to attend the "workshops" the school provides with time to learn more about photography and editing photos with software applications for 2 reasons:

1. He has gymnastics after school on Wednesdays which was the only day of the week the workshops were offered (and this is so important for his gross motor coordination, etc).
2. [and more importantly] He couldn't sit still and comprehend what the task was...he would be a distraction to other kids trying to really accomplish something

So....here I am with about 3 weeks to go until this has to be turned in and I can't get the kid to take pictures of "places". He's required to turn in his best 5 photos in each of 3 categories: people, places, things. Of course, the things he has mastered: he's taken hundreds of photos of his toys; and the people thing wasn't too hard...it's the places that are hard to get him interested in.

I'll keep you updated regarding how this goes.

Reading

Jack read No David!, David Gets In Trouble and David Goes to School tonight at bedtime. I love the inflection and expression he uses. He actually has a David voice...

BUT...

He's memorized these stories. Getting him to actually look at the print is next to impossible. Though I know that his ability to read will come; is excruciating for me to watch him pointing randomly, yet forcefully at the page...He's just not making the connection between print and the spoken word...

Alas, he loves books. He will read one day, I just know it...(I hope...)

Cool Project

I got Jackson this monkey kit while visiting Aunty Rainey and Iris in San Fransisco. He did a great job sewing, dressing and stuffing the monkey. I'm looking for another kit like it.

He's also enjoying the resistance bands I got to work out with. He says, "fly a kite" and lets one trail behind him.

This is from his teacher's notebook today,

We had a Silly Safari today-very cool program-the guy had a vulture, frog, spider, rat and alligator. The rat got a time out for not listening and the guy put him in his pocket and said, 'now you have to have a time out'. Jackson was laughing so hard about the rat getting a time out. He keeps laughing about it!

He was also laughing about it at home!!! It's so nice to be able to
share in somthing that happened at school!

Routine

Back in school (great sigh of relief passes)...

While I think that the variation in predictability is good for Jackson, I also really notice without structure and routine, he has a tendency to withdraw into his own world. The honest truth is that the holidays were so busy, hectic and stressful for me that I didn't make the effort to keep him engaged. Now that he's back in school he's more focused, verbal and settled.

I have to wonder, what 'his world' is like? What is it there that comforts him, draws him away from 'us'. Is his mind bouncing from place to place; or is he content to float within his own reality? Is he capable of actually thinking about his actions or do his needs propel him forward? I know he understands consequences and limits, but I have to wonder how he processes time, thought...

My insomniac brain has detoured to the curious, how far would we go to know his thoughts, hear his words beyond what he has now; what if the elusive "cure" is found? would his life be better? would he be grateful to be released from the prison of autism, or would he long for the isolation his disability brings?

My prayer for patience is answered daily when the Lord gives me opportunities to grow this attribute through the daily trials of living with autism.

Wearing Down

Thinking about the future for Jackson can be so depressing.
It's actually exhausting trying to stay ahead of the game with his needs.
A wonderful friend once said "autism isn't for wimps" and it's so very, very true. I think the same can be said for all parents with "special" kids. There are so many things to keep track of, so many "battles" to fight, I can totally understand those that throw in the towel. There are days we go moment to moment.

We really need school to start...